No Longer Just About Me

Last week, I saw the cutest thing in my backyard.  My 2 year-old son was pushing a toy shopping cart across the backyard, and every now and then, he would stop, and pretend to pull a string out of it.

I took a picture, but he was a little far away.

You see, now that we have moved to a new state and become homeowners, my husband now has the responsibility of mowing the lawn.  For some reason, children are fascinated by lawnmowers and love to watch.  As I saw my son with the shopping cart, I realized he was pretending to mow the lawn, just like his daddy.

He fell asleep pretending to play video games like Daddy :)

I have been doing some things to really work on improving myself.  A lot of work on finding more peace and strength within myself, while drawing closer to God and trying to become more like Him.  I will share more details about the specifics of that in another post.  But suffice it to say, becoming a better person has been a major focus on my mind the last 2-3 weeks.

A few days ago, I was vacuuming my living room and slipped into that place of deep thought, where some profound ideas came together for me.  When I was single, the focus of my life was on myself.  Improving my life used to be about me, because I wanted to be better, for myself.  Of course, I still do.  But becoming better has a new, higher, more selfless purpose now.  When I became a parent, the focus of my life shifted to my kids.  That day, the breath and depth of that shift sank in with the words...

Not even improving myself is just about me anymore.

Our children want to be like us.  That is why my son enjoys pretending to mow the lawn--because he wants to do what Daddy does.  Really, a huge part of parenting is being a good example, because what they see me do speaks so much louder than anything I could ever say to them.  And so, anything I do to become better will give them a better example to emulate.  Even becoming a better person is not just about me now.  The better example I can be, the better foundation they will have to jump from as adults in improving themselves, and the lives they touch.  My life is no longer just about me.  It is so much bigger than me.