Painless Childbirth, revisited

Lately, my Understanding "Painless" Childbirth post has gotten a lot of attention. I'm so glad, because much of what is in it is so important for women to know. I have gotten a few comments from women who experienced painless childbirth without hypnosis. I think these stories are awesome and they fit right in with the ideology that birth doesn't have to be painful. Here is one of the comments, explaining the various degrees of comfort for her five births.

[. . . ]I experienced almost painless childbirth with and without drugs and never used hypnosis. I think it is different for everyone..[. . . ]In five births, number one and two were painless with drugs. Number three was painful. Number four was not painful until the last ten seconds and number five was painless

I just started focusing on reassuring the baby and the surges never got painful with four and five. The crowning was not painful on number three and number five.

The contractions hurt on number three (possibly because I was panting to keep the baby in on the dash to the hospital.)

Notice her theory that fighting against what her body wanted to do in order to get to the hospital before giving birth may have caused more pain that was necessary. I have been meaning to write about why I feel my second birth became uncomfortable during second stage, after I was almost completely comfortable for first stage, including transition.

My birth plan said "limit vaginal exams to those I request, unless necessary for a medical decision." This request was ignored soon after my OB started to tell I was getting pushy. She had me get into a good position to be checked (big mistake #1 was getting into that position in the first place, big mistake #2 was not getting out of it) and when I was found to have just a lip of cervix left, she continued to check periodically without saying anything. I didn't really mind much at the time since I was really focused on relaxing through the waves, but I do understand why some women feel violated by things like that. I had read about the flaws of the rule of 10 and wanted to be able to push a little if I felt like it even though I was not "10 centimeters." At first, my OB's advice supported this, and she encouraged me to push only as much as I felt I had to. The waves felt different and I began to vocalize through them, because it felt better to, but I was still using my hypnosis and staying comfortable. I don't know how much time passed, but she must have gotten impatient, so she wanted to try holding back the lip of cervix and having me push, which was extremely uncomfortable.

All of you who work with birthing women, this is important, during birthing, our brains sometimes don't clearly interpret what you mean when you say things to us. When trying to hold back the lip of cervix didn't make it go away, my OB told me to try not to push, though I think now she must have meant to only push as much as I had to, but in my confused birth-brain, I read it as "don't push at all" which was very different from what my body was telling me to do, and I think greatly increased the discomfort and, I dare say, pain that I experienced. It is likely that the fighting my body and the confusion caused the pain, not necessarily the pressure waves. When she started telling me I could push, obviously that implied the lip was gone, but again, I had birth-brain. This (and not getting out of that bed) is why I think I ended up needing to be coached to push him out. Once I started really pushing, it wasn't really painful anymore. Crowning didn't really hurt to me either, just felt like really intense stinging.

Here is another comment from a woman who experienced a painless birth:

I had a painless birth with my fifth baby. It was so painless that I didn't realize it was real until he was crowing. (Luckily my husband recognized subtle changes in my mood and called the midwife, who arrived just in time.)

I did not do hypnosis. I just practiced relaxing my perineum with each braxton hicks. When I was lying in bed, in active labor, I thought I was having BH contractions so I just kept relaxing my perineum.

It didn't even hurt when he was crowning. I tore a little and that stung but not bad at all.

For the record: My son was 10lb 6oz and I have a ridiculously low pain threshold

That is pretty amazing. Her comments illustrate beautifully that women do not have to have an unusually strong ability to endure pain to have enjoyable natural birth experiences--it is not an issue of how much pain you can take, but how you choose to think about the sensation you're experiencing.

In both this story and the previous, the moms did not have the painless experience until they had already been through birth before. These women have probably found a solution to the fear problem by experiencing birth. Since they have done it before, they don't need to fear the unknown. Thinking you're not really in labor would probably reduce the fear, too.

Here is another one, from a midwife

[. . .] I had painless childbirth with all my babies. I think it was because I did unassisted births and no one talked to me or touched me while in active labor. I was able to go into the zone and time seemed to stand still. But every time I looked at the clock an hour had gone by. When it was over I felt like I had just had the best sex ever. I was 17 and had a 5 and 1/2 hour labor with my first.

As a midwife, I try to allow my moms to go to that zone, but I also have to listen to the baby, give drinks of water, etc. I tell my apprentices not to talk to her, just support as they see a need and be aware of the mom's response.

I have discussed unassisted birth before. I do think that women are likely to have more comfortable birth experiences if they can be undisturbed. Undisturbed birth does not necessarily have to be unattended. If a doctor or midwife can act as a lifeguard, then a "best of both worlds" birth is possible. The benefits being able to stay focused and follow your instincts while still having a knowledgeable expert available to step in if they are needed. This appears to be how this midwife practices and teaches her apprentices to practice.

Understanding "Painless" Childbirth

This post is inspired by a recent conversation on my natural childbirth forum, as well as a few birth stories I have read from Hypnobabies moms who were surprised to find that their pressure waves felt "painful" to them. It also is a response to something I stumbled upon while browsing the archives of a natural childbirth blog, in which the author said she would not want to have a painless birth.

So, what is up with "painless" childbirth?

A few women are rumored to have "painless" births without special preparation. I think this is probably pretty rare, but the fact that it happens is notable. The majority of women who refer to their births ans "painless" or "pain-free" are women who used hypnosis.

I think this is something that is commonly misunderstood, and I admit I didn't understand it when I was preparing for my first birth. I read the book Hypnobirthing by Marie Mongan, and listened to the CD that came with it a few times. As I understood it, Mongan was teaching that all "pain" in childbirth was a result of the fear/tension/pain cycle, meaning birth will not be painful if you are not afraid of it. I believed that what we experience in birth is a direct result of what we expect, so I chose not to expect pain. I was really oversimplifying things, and I was in for a rude awakening.

When I started having contractions (I refer to them as "contractions" here because that is what I called them at the time--I didn't buy into the idea of changing the words then) I admitted that "they hurt," but it was very manageable. They went on for quite a long time, going away and coming back, and then I was given a very low dose of pitocin, and those contractions really hurt. I was still able to cope using movement and deep breathing for a while, but I was really miserable. I do recognize that there was a psychological element to this pain. In my mind, something external (pitocin) was inflicting pain upon me, instead of it being caused by my own uterine muscles contracting. This, as well as exhaustion and pressure to dilate due to risk of infection, made it much harder for me to cope.

I think that I, as a first timer, espoused a common misconception about painless birth: believing that your birth will be painless just because you've heard of it and believe it's possible. I didn't think I needed to do anything to have a painless birth; I thought it would just happen because birth is not "meant" to be painful (right, Dr. Dick-Read?)

My understanding of this changed when I did the Hypnobabies program for my second birth. I don't know if there is really a difference in the two programs' views or if my experiences caused me to have this new understanding. I don't know if birth is really "meant" to be painful or not, but I do know that it involves a stimulus that the majority (at least in our culture) of women's brains interpret as "pain," which is generally experienced as a negative thing. Good hypnosis for childbirth provides a system for changing your mind so that the stimulus is interpreted as not painful, so that it can be experienced more positively. For me, with my second birth, experiencing it positively involved a conscious choice on my part.

Both Hypnobirthing and Hypnobabies use a technique of renaming some of the words commonly used in childbirth. This is a strange practice and, I admit, it's a little cumbersome at times, but many women find it helpful to avoid negative associations their subconscious may have with the words. One example is avoiding use of the word "pain" and using "discomfort" instead, because it is not as negative of a word. Some could argue that "painless childbirth" is about semantics, but it's really about what you choose to believe.

I believe that most women who have unmedicated births are able to find a way to experience the stimulus of the sensations of childbirth as not a bad thing, even if they do experience them as painful. In embracing a "pain with a purpose" ideology, women are choosing to tweak their understanding of the word "pain" (which is usually a negative word to describe a sensation that occurs when the body is being harmed) to include a kind of pain that is good. This essentially means changing the negative connotation of the word "pain" to be positive in this particular circumstance, while with hypnosis, we simply change the word, eliminating the negative connotation altogether.

I think some people, when they hear "painless," assume that means not feeling anything--that the "hypno-anesthesia" would be like an epidural and make them numb. It doesn't work this way. Hypno-anesthesia is very strong endorphins. It's like when you cut yourself or you twist your ankle and at first it hurts a lot, but then it doesn't hurt as much, that's endorphins. They soothe and dull pain, but they don't take away sensation. With a pain-free unmedicated birth with hypnosis, you would still feel your baby being born, it just wouldn't feel like pain to you.

Sometimes the talk of feeling "only pressure and tightening" in Hypnobabies leads women to expect that birthing waves will feel just like Braxton-Hicks waves. This is not true either. Braxtion-Hicks are just tightening sensations, for me, birthing waves (and also the pre-birth waves that can occur irregularly for weeks before the actual birth) have an extra level of intensity--what I now call a "downward pressure" which signaled to me that my uterus was now working to begin moving my baby down instead of just flexing itself for the exercise.

One of the changes in the new 6th edition of Hypnobabies is the re-recording and re-naming of a track that used to be called "Painless Childbirth" to "Easy, Comfortable Childbirth." Hypnobabies appears to be moving away from using the word "painless," which, considering all of the misconceptions about it, I think is a good move. I feel like "comfortable" is a more accurate description of how Hypnobabies helped me. Whatever sensations I felt (some of which I may have called "painful" under other circumstances), I knew they were normal and was able to not be afraid of them, which allowed me to feel calm and confident and not out-of-control or panicky (except during the cervical lip and the pushing, but I have theories about that). I wouldn't say I was "in pain," because for me, being "in pain" never involves that degree of serenity and self-composure.

I know there are some women for whom surviving the pain of childbirth provides a sense of accomplishment. It makes them feel like they are "hardcore." I, on the other hand, am not "hardcore," nor do I want to be. I can get a sense of accomplishment from seeing that I did something most people experience as very painful, and it was mostly comfortable to me, and I did it with my mind!